January 15, 2008

Oh civilisation!

Disclaimer:
  • I am not trying to that say something is right or wrong. I am not trying to propose a solution. I am just trying to analyse the reason behind eve teasing.
  • This is just a hypothesis I am putting forth. I haven't done any research to verify this.
This is a response to CoNfUsEd's this post. You may want to read that first. Why do men do eve teasing? Because their sex life is not as good as they want it to be. (A man could be sleeping with several women and yet remain "perverted". What he actually wants in his sex life is only up to him. He might still be unsatisfied and looking for more 'different' ways to get sexual pleasure. After all, sex is more and more related to mind than body.) OK. Why some (or most) men are not happy with their sex life? Because they are not allowed to do whatever they want. Because they are not allowed to do sex experiments. Especially in India, people believe that extramarital sex is a Bad Thing and tie it to the so-called Indian culture (IMNSHO this so-called culture is a BS). In addition to that, they are encouraged to repress all their emotions and act like Good Men. How long can someone keep repressing something? Why do we repress our sexual desires? Because that's a part of our so-called civilisation. Civilisation has done several Good Things to us, the society. Like everything else, it brings its own Bad Things. This is just a side effect of the way our society works. Unless we change something very fundamental to our society (e.g. throw the idea of marriages into trash) men will continue to harass women; women will keep saying "WTF?" whenever they face such harassments; people like me who think they have the solution for everything under the sun would keep proposing not-so-practical ideas. Welcome to Civilised World!-)

6 comments:

  1. You saying Extra-marital sex is good?

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  2. @Arun Sundar:

    In a way, yes. I don't exactly mean what you think. Extramarital sex is intolerable in our society because we have a screwed up marriage system. I am insisting on a more flexible marriage and sexual relationship.

    "You are supposed to have sex only with your wife" attitude is something I don't like. Mere existence of the term "extramarital sex" implies that having sex with others is not correct. Remove the words like "prostitution" and "extramarital" from the dictionary itself. Life would be better without those ideas. The more something is hidden or prohibited the more it disturbs you.

    So my answer is "Yes, but conditions apply." Extramarital relationships won't do any good as long as we keep calling it with a name. If we accept it as something natural, then there's a way to come out of the perversion mud.

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  3. now i'm totally confused! From what i understand, u're saying men behave this way cos there's no proper sexual vent available? What kind of sexual vent do u except 18-19 year old men to have? And since when could u use the first woman u came across for ur sexual appeasement?
    As for the married men, why don't they make their wives walk on the road and grope them? Seems like a new experience to me!
    As for extra marital affairs, lets not even go there!

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  4. @CoNfUsEd:
    "What kind of sexual vent do u except 18-19 year old men to have? And since when could u use the first woman u came across for ur sexual appeasement?"

    The idea is, no one should define these. We decide what we eat. We decide what we read. We decide when we sleep. Likewise we should have the freedom to have sex (in any form) at any time.

    Don't think of it as men using women. I am not saying all women should go sleep with anyone who invites them for sex. Mutual consent is important; but a woman doesn't have to say "No" just because she is married to someone else.

    "As for the married men, why don't they make their wives walk on the road and grope them? Seems like a new experience to me!"

    Groping one's own wife? Married men indulge in groping because they are bored of their wives. (Heard of ஆசை அறுபது நாள், மோகம் முப்பது நாள்?)

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  5. You really think sex deprivation is the issue here? I was thinking more like being able to get away with the first try encourages the second attempt.
    And the second crucial point to note: Most women are weak - coz they fear god knows what all.

    And just FYI - some women like the writer of WTF, her roomie, and a few others I know -actually will drag a man and kick him if he messes with them.. and you know where it hurts the most!

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  6. @TurbulentTranquility:

    "I was thinking more like being able to get away with the first try encourages the second attempt."

    Well, it does. But I am thinking of a solution to the problem itself. Not some workaround so that we can live with the problem.

    "Most women are weak - coz they fear god knows what all."

    I could be completely wrong. But I think it's mainly because of the way girls are treated in the society. As far as I have seen, many (not all) parents keep their daughters dumb by e.g. not giving them a lot or responsibilities, etc.

    "And just FYI - some women like the writer of WTF, her roomie, and a few others I know -actually will drag a man and kick him if he messes with them.. and you know where it hurts the most!"

    That's good to know. (But why do you say this here? I don't get the context.)

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